Author: Kealy 
Date:   27-06-03 19:27

Sorry, it's a Friday evening and I have just finished my first week off another exile back in Ireland.

Boring bus journey back to Naas caught in the traffic of the spotty hordes driving to Punchestown to see Eminem and I got to thinking what is the worst beer I have had the displeasure to drink.

Killian's Red in a number of pubs in Boston, and one in Hampton Wick. By far the worst of my life, and I have drunk some shocking brews !!!

Author: russell o'callaghan 
Date:   27-06-03 22:54

Kealy,
I once helped an American whose car had broken down out in deepest Essex. In grateful thanks he gave me about four or five bottles of Schlitz, "the beer that made Milwaukee famous".
Most people would surely dismiss its unique taste as "indescribable" but I'll try. Imagine, if you can, a shandy made up of Theakston's " Old Peculiar" and Lucozade.
Last year I was having dinner out with my son, Danny's, in-laws in Houston, Texas, and I told them this story. They'd had a drink. One of them asked me how many bottles I'd drunk. I said " all of 'em". When the hysteria had died down one of them called me "a goddammed liar".

I was also once on a club trip to Brive. Down there they drink a raspberry flavoured beer called something like "coquorico". Try it sometime, Kealy; I think you'll find it......."interesting".
Slàn leat go foill,
Russell O'C

Author: Duggers 
Date:   28-06-03 18:59

Tartan Special....no question.......brewed at the same brewery as SKOL...


you know your tastebuds are gone if you ever start enjoying a pint o speshal....on the other hand there is also McEwans Export......the red death........

Author: Reading_Fatboy 
Date:   28-06-03 20:39

Schlitz is by far the worst beer I have ever drunk. It gives you the mother of all hangovers, but it is impossible to get P*ss*d on the rotten stuff

FATBOY

Siiiiiiiiiiiing yer hearts out for the lads

Author: MrsGoz 
Date:   28-06-03 22:52

Warm!

Author: ascotintheantipodes 
Date:   29-06-03 01:39

A week on Smithwicks(???) at Roundstone in Galway (or is it Connamarra)would have to be the worst in my life....filthy stuff

Author: Matt of London Irish 
Date:   29-06-03 10:31

I shall never forget the dreadful beer experience that was Calder during our visit to Edinburgh for the European Cup.

Absolutely dreadful and a terrible reminder of The Watney Party 4 experience of the early and mid 70's

Matt

Author: SubTel 
Date:   29-06-03 11:42

Well, if we are going back to the early 70's pre-CAMRA days then it has got to be Starlight and Watneys Red Barrel.

Makes todays Interbrew Euro-fizz shoite look very good !

Note: Watney are still the only company who have managed to dilute water !!

What's Watneys Red Barrel and making love in a canoe got in common ?

Author: anthony 
Date:   29-06-03 13:15

Colt 45

This is the worst...... isnt it?

vile stuff

Author: HookRoyal 
Date:   29-06-03 21:53

Schlitz and Killian are up there as the worst, but the one that has the worst effect on me is "Miller Genuine Draught" but only ythe canned variety brewed in Puerto Rico, it makes me go completely nastily drunk. Bottled or euro brewed ones are O.K.

Any smooth flow bitter has got to be bad as it is Oxymoronic, "Smooth Bitter".
Export Guinnes as brewed by the Belikin Brewey in Belize, bottled guinnes at 8% in 30° C just does not work.

Author: Green, white and Gary Gold 
Date:   29-06-03 23:35

the warm (i kid u not) pint of 'extra cold guinness' I had at the kassam stadium today at the U21 world cup final. They ran out of lager and had cans of tetleys smooth (vaguely cold) as the only other option. And people think the madstad is bad. Those of you who have had the misfortune to watch the 2 LI games at the kassam won't believe that it was actually warm in the stadium today - i couldn't believe it!!

Author: confusedidentity 
Date:   30-06-03 08:53

Cruzcampo from Seville. Not a lager, not a plisner(as it says it is) truly feckin awful. Mind you the glasgow alky horades guzzled it by the gallon

Author: BrianC 
Date:   30-06-03 09:20

Whilst we're on the subject of truly awful beers, does anyone remember Double Diamond? Not quite as bad as Red Barrell but gave it a good run for it's money.

Author: Reading_Fatboy 
Date:   30-06-03 09:26

It worked wonders for me Brian.

FATBOY

Siiiiiiiiiiiing yer hearts out for the lads

Author: SubTel 
Date:   30-06-03 09:52

..... and from the same Ind Coupe pub era..... Long Life on draught !

Author: Reading_Fatboy 
Date:   30-06-03 11:04

When I was a wee lad. Back in nineteen hundred and frozen to death, my dear old dad, (who was a really tough and durable chap six two, and 17 stone of firm stuff). Bought a watneys pale ale party four. He opened it on Christmas Eve, and drunk the last drops on New years eve.

He then proceeded, and I quote his very words, to "shiver and shake, go hot and cold, and Sh1te throughy the eye of a dress makers needle until twelfth night"

Were he alive now, I am sure he would say that that ws deffo the worst beer.

FATBOY

Siiiiiiiiiiiing yer hearts out for the lads

Author: Viks 
Date:   30-06-03 11:07

AG................................in Tokyo

Viks

Author: BrianC 
Date:   30-06-03 11:46

Viks, I know what you mean. In the Far East market bottled AG is a very strong, thick, sticky sweet concoction totally unlike the drink we know and love over here. I bought a bottle once when I was in Malaysia, never again.

It's also pitched at a different market. The advertising shows things like a guy stepping out of his ferarri, stepping into the casino and ordering an AG whilst gorgeous girls are throwing themselves at him. Not quite the same brand image as in the European market.

Author: confusedidentity 
Date:   30-06-03 12:21

Despite what my learned uncle, and maybe Mutts would perhaps say to the contrary, I found the AG in Brisbane and other parts of the merry ol' land of Oz to be most disagreeable, but drinkable ina desparate alky kind of way.
However, I think the draught Newcastle Brown and Mc Ewan's export over there may have been worse.

Author: SubTel 
Date:   30-06-03 12:30

Talking of Oz, I tried some stuff over there called Coopers Ale....... which if poured out of the pint crown corked bottle slowly into a glass doesn't taste too bad. However, these bottles have 6mm of yeast sediment at the bottom and the Ozzies shake the frigging bottle before serving it. Yuk !!

Author: kevin 
Date:   30-06-03 12:45

When times was bad we were forced to buy Vaux 'Silver'. Yuk! Could have put me off alcohol for life.

Author: dom_pedro 
Date:   30-06-03 12:59

I'd go with Brian's Malaysian Guinness as the worst, but the draught stuff rather than the bottles. I think they brew it somewhere locally with local water ... there's a strong tang of preservative to it too.

But talking of time's being bad, I'm sure I've stooped to drink Colt 45 in the past ... not to mention Merrydown and Tenants Super snakebite.

Author: Viks 
Date:   30-06-03 13:07

Brian,

It was a pint, not in bottles. However, I don't like guinness at the best of times so I guess I was never going to like it much out there!!!!

Vaux is a nasty brew. Wouldn't touch it with someone else's bargepole!

Viks

Author: Saintsby 
Date:   30-06-03 13:47

Brew 10 (or as we knew it 'spew10'

Agree ref DD double diamond

Lagers - Long Life,, ... yewch!

Castlemaine xxxx (Q Why do the Ausies call their beer xxxx, A Cos they can't spell P**s!)

Skoll it'l turn you into a troll

Also remember a usually nice bitter from the Lake District, Hartleys of Ulverston. Some years back me and a number of mates (6 )got rat legged on some slightly off Hartleys....Blimey I think we burnt the tents afterwards. Or as one mate said the morning after "You need two a*******s with that stuff! t'aint fair on one.
Lake district walking ...happy days!

Author: Worried of Whitton 
Date:   30-06-03 15:54


.. The pint that masquerades as being London Pride

at the pub I pass on the way to the Stoop and HQ

Author: Viks 
Date:   30-06-03 16:35

I have to say that down here, they just don't know how to serve decent beer. I can't remember the last time I got a pint of bitter with a proper head on it. Is it just a northern thing to have a head on bitter - hardly ever see it down south!

As I'm sure Coochie will vouch, you need to go to the Dog & Gun (think that's the name, I never can remember it) between Denholme & Oxenhope for a pint of Timmy Taylor's Landlord. It's well worth a small detour on your way up to the Leeds game. And whilst I'm on my soapbox, find a decent chippy up there too, you'll discover what you've been missing all these years.

Viks

Author: alex22 
Date:   30-06-03 17:09

Well for any of you who've ever lived in the Nottingham area you will know that there used to be three local breweries - Hardy Hanson/Kimberleys, Shipstones and Home Ales. None of them were worth writing home about and the Shipstiones was positively dire (on a par with Double Diamond), but as a student they had one big advantage - they were very cheap. I can recall buying a gallon of Kimberleys in a pub in Beeston in 1979 and having enough change from £2 to get a bag of chips on the way home!

Author: Viks 
Date:   30-06-03 17:29

ooh ohh - I've got it. Worst beer ever HAS to be Dogbolter that they serve in the Firkin Pubs. I got a free pint as a student when The Friar & Firkin opened in Lancaster and I could not bring myself to drink the whole pint.

Yes, a student refusing free beer - there HAS to be something wrong with it

Viks

Author: russell o'callaghan 
Date:   30-06-03 18:43

Fatboy mentioned a "Party Four". Do you remember their big brother, the "Party Seven"? You used to use a kind of triangular s***** thing to open them with. By the time one had fallen off a motor-bike a couple of times on the way to the party, been rolled along the pavement with your feet 'cos your hands were full of bottles and then been fought over in the kitchen it was like sweating gelignite.
When the s***** thing first pierced the skin the whole kitchen would be instantly re-decorated in a tasteful shade of "Kentish Hopfield".
When your mate's parents returned and saw the state every molecule of his Mum's body-mass would convert itself to pure energy according to the formula e=mc2.
Slàn libh go foill,
Russell O'C

Author: SubTel 
Date:   30-06-03 19:25

"triangular s***** thing"........ you mean a screwdriver !!

The posh people had those things for them which looked like a mini beer tap with a sparklet CO2 bulb screwed in !

Halcyon days !

Author: Kealy 
Date:   30-06-03 20:17

Screwdriver ? That s***** thing was the girlfriend's stilletto heel in our part of the world. How to ruin a shoe and decorate a kitchen in one go.

This has been really entertaining reading, it has also dredged up memories of other foul brews which I will add in a bit. However I still stick with Killian's Red in the Tam O'Shanter in Boston. It is the only pint that I have not finished ever....my request for a refund was greeted with amazement by the barman. Even worse than my mate's first attempt at homebrew (aged 16) back in Worcester.

Ah what the hell, here goes.

Ansell's Bitter for anyone else brought up my side of the Midlands. I was staggered to find this on draft in a bar in Italy in the shadow of the Matterhorn on a ski-ing trip. Like a moth drawn to light I had to try it just for the surreal circumstances I found it in. It was truly as awful as I remembered.

Double Diamond - we're only here for the beer - no, not the worst for me.

Triple Crown Bitter in a number of pubs in London. Cheap and nasty, oh so nasty.

Ward's Bitter in the Princess Louise, Holborn. However I never had a decent pint of bitter from there - a so-called beer pub.

ESB

Some stuff on Jersey back in uni days. St Mary's Bitter maybe ? Nearly as bad as Killian's come to think of it.

I have not had the (dis)pleasure of trying Schlitz. I now feel I have to.